No going back

Earlier this week, Todd and Suzy over at A.S.S. asked if their readers could give up spanking. Some of the answers really made me think and I asked Lash about it last night. We had an interesting talk. My question boiled down to this: if he had to choose between the relationship we have with DD (minus the spanking) or to continue spanking but lose the changes in our marriage, which would he choose? I was really surprised that he chose the spanking. I thought of the spankings as a means to an end for him - a closer relationship and a way to enforce his wishes for my behavior. It turns out that after many years of trying to get him to spank me, it only took a little info about DD to turn him into a spanking fiend... um, I mean, aficionado.

On a more serious note, I had an “aha!” moment during this conversation. When I asked if he could really go back to the way we acted toward each other before DD, he looked at me very sternly and said that he would never tolerate some of my past behavior (or words to that effect). I knew he meant it and I suddenly realized (again) that this is very, very real, not some story or fantasy. We aren’t going back, we’re only going forward wherever it may lead us. So it looks like DD, including spanking, is very much part of my future. And I’m happy with that!