His First Mate wrote about taking a break from DD and I began to think about our current health-related "break" and wondered if others have a story to tell about this subject.
Have any of you deliberately taken a break from DD (or ttwd in any form)?
Have you been forced to stop for a while because of real life issues? Health? Privacy? Separation?
Have you ever decided DD wasn't for you but then chosen to try it again? Did it work better the second time?
Do you think your husband (HOH, Master, partner, wife, etc.) would agree to a break if you asked for one?
If you took a break was it harder or easier to start again?
Any thoughts?
15 comments:
We're taking a break currently - probably for about 6 weeks due to A's health issues. Not sure what's going to happen after that, he hasn't mentioned the subject at all so who knows? I am floundering... L
Davey and I obviously have more breaks than most; since we see each other for a week or two per year, at best! But inbetween, we used cam and phone and he ordered me to self spank...no cheating, since he could see the results! But even that (though I hated it, it proved effective at times) has had to stop since my kids moved back home! (Sheesh, guys, I strongly recommend downsizing the INSTANT your lil fledglings fly the nest!!!) So now we are on a permanent break until we are together next vacation....AND IT SUCKS.
xxx
Pregnancy is a time where we are s "spank free" as far as real discipline goes. They have been times where we are more active in this lifestyle than others. Yet somehow in one way or another we always come back to it.
Don't know if this quite fits. We committed to DD before we married but some awful stuff happened just as we got married and my husband never followed through in any real way. I always knew that if I poked the bear too hard, he just might spank and he did on a few occasions. Interestingly, it was when our marriage hit a really rough spot that he stopped altogether and became passive guy. It took a mutual decision and some real hard discussions before I was willing to try again. I can lead or be led, but not something in between. Wishy washy doesn't work here so if we were to take a break, it would have to be all the way. Don't think it would happen though...he seems to be quite enjoying his new role.
Though we just started into this in a more serious manner, we've been experimenting with this lifestyle for awhile now. And yes, there was a time when we took a break. It was due to a health issue of mine. I suppose we weren't really doing dd yet then, but spanking was certainly out the window for a little while. It took us awhile to get back into it. I think Michael wanted to be sure that I was ok, that it wouldn't hurt me...well, not in a way he didn't intend anyway. ;)
Alex and I seem to be on some kind of break for now. I say "seem" because it's still somewhat hazy to me and I am rather upset about it.
We have a lot going on right now -- we're undergoing a home addition and renovation (it's nearing completion, hopefully within 6 weeks, but we still have people here Mon - Fri from 7:30 - 4:30). Then we have the caring and managing of our three school-aged special-needs kids, which requires our constant supervision, frequent interventions, and the putting out of many "fires". Add to this Alex's job, which is very physically demanding -- and he often has to get up at 3:15 am.
He was being very inconsistent and totally let go of maintenance spankings when I stopped asking/reminding him. He's also let so much slide with me -- even to the point of being passive at times. We talked about it, and he said he doesn't want to let me down -- that he knows how much Dd means to me -- he says it's very important to him, too. However, he'd like to hold off until the house is done. I feel so let down and sad. I told him I thought it was a shame that our relationship had to take a hit. I also told him that, while I will do my best to be respectful toward him, he doesn't get to "pick and choose" when he will express dominance -- that I need a consistent expression of his dominance/authority/control in order for my submission to be active and real. I don't know. Do you think I'm being unfair? With all due respect to my husband, I feel like he's wimping out on me....Katherine
People have to take breaks from some parts of DD if they live in the real world. Health and privacy are two definite factors that are going to cause this. We don't do DD (sigh...) but we keep a spanking relationship going most of the time.
Our breaks are when he seems to totally forget and then I get hurt and pull away until he finally notices and we start up again in some fashion. Not perfect but it works, I guess.
But of course, dd is not only spanking. It's feeling the protection of someone watching over you - of being in charge and when you can't spank for this feeling there are other ways. For physical sensation there are hot creams he can apply to give that 'spanking after burn' with no noise.
Just remember DD is a state of mind. If both partners are willing it can easily survive a break it that what you want.
Best of luck,
PK
My form of DD is when I am at a friend's house and she takes full control of the situation. With my stressful work, there are times when being submissive is well worth the pain and humiliation. Every now and then my friend and I have other issues to tend to, but when it is time for some form of control, I submit willingly.
its not all about spanking....only the spanking part need stop when health or privacy issues come into play. Hubby doesnt object too much if the kids are about he will still spank me,.....my parents are coming to visit at xmas and i nkow then the spanking will stop while they are here but everyting else wont- the looks, the warnings, the telling off....
If it were only spanking that stopped, I wouldn't be this upset. Everything has stopped and taken a back seat. No look, no stern voice....the dominance is gone.
The main deal with my DD is when I get spanked or paddled and am sent to the corner with my sore bottom bared for all to see. If it is just the one woman, it isn't a big deal.
However, if I get spanked in front of or by more, being sent to the corner with others laughing, teasing and such with me totally naked is very humiliating. But, full control is the key and I submit willingly.
we took a break.....just because - and we wound up back at the same place. We decided that DD just wasn't something we could give up after seeing how much it helped to improve our dynamic.
With us, it's just kind of really a way of life. Some things may be allowed to slide if something happened that put one of us out of commission, but as for a break. No, this is our way of life.
Sammi
I have asked for a break but he considers breaks to be a bad idea and he won't allow them. Right now he has allowed a modified arrangement, at my request, only while he is away from home for a long job. But the four Ds are still enforced, just not every one of my more detailed rules.
For me, I am very glad for this. I know full dd will resume soon but I am grateful that he listened to my needs.
What would we day dream about if our lives were nothing but fantasy?
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