As I’ve been catching up on blogs I ran across one that talked about punishment spankings and mostly rejected the word “punishment”, preferring the terms “choice” or “consequence”.
Shortly after we reinstated spanking after my surgery, I earned a punishment spanking - and I mean really, really earned it by doing something that I promised I wouldn’t do again. It was dangerous, stupid and I did it right in front of Lash. He wasn’t able to do anything about it that day except hold me, listen to me talk about it and let me cry. Then he asked if I needed a punishment spanking. He thought I was being hard enough on myself, feeling miserable, full of regret and remorse. I knew I needed the spanking, told him so and he gave me one the next day. When I read the blog I mentioned above, I began to think about the term punishment.
Punishment is “ the infliction or imposition of a penalty as retribution for an offense”. Retribution is “punishment that is considered to be morally right and fully deserved”.
I felt my spanking was morally right and fully deserved and it was my choice. Lash and I have chosen this kind of life. We mutually decide that some behavior is unacceptable to both of us. We also agree that spanking will be the consequence when I behave in certain ways. Lash has never punished me without my agreement. So it is my “choice”, the “consequence” of my behavior and a just retribution or “punishment” - all three at once. In my mind, I can't separate them.
A punishment spanking clears the air between us, relieves the weight of any guilt I carry and marks a new beginning. Those are the reasons I believe it is good for us, necessary for us and, no matter what we name it, one embodiment of our love for each other.
7 comments:
I completely agree with you. I feel exactly the same about punishments - that is their purpose. I just wish i could my partner to understand it. Maybe in time. A very nice post :) thank you for sharing it. xxx
Yes, Meow, absolutely my feeling; and Davey agrees now he understands the difference it makes. I would never deliberately hurt him, and when I have inadvertently done so, it makes me feel worse, somehow, when he readily and unquestioningly accepts my apology, just like that! I feel justice has not been done. I NEED the punishment for the crime, before I can let it rest. It sort of 'puts it to bed' better, and I can relax in his arms afterwards.
*sigh* that we can't do this as often as needed...but, one day....xxx
I didn't know you were back blogging Meow. A big welcome,it's so good to see you.
Congratulations to Lash's on his retirement, have fun and enjoy each other now you have more time.
Love,
Ronnie
xx
Meow,
It's good to see you back. I liked this post and I do understand it.
Hugs,
PK
I'm glad I'm not alone in feeling this way. Thanks to ronnie and PK for the welcome back!
Meow, Welcome back! I have missed reading your posts. To me a punishment gives me the feeling of a clean slate when all is said and done. The things I am punished for are things I asked to be accountable for, so it is my choice also.
Again, happy to see you posting!
hugs,
Katia
Katia, It's good to hear from you.
Post a Comment